It's 2:25 a.m - I've made the dough for the challah for Rosh Hashana; I've made the fish (two types) and I've made two salads. I need to close down and sleep a bit but my mind is racing. With all the cooking, I haven't really had time to contemplate what last year meant to me, what I hope and pray for in the year to come.
This past year was so different than I expected it to be in so many ways. Shmulik was married; Amira was a new mother. I was hoping Elie would find someone - never really believing it would be Lauren though I had always had a feeling she'd be perfect for them. Now, a year later, they've been married 5 months already!
Aliza has grown so tall - she's within an inch or two of me...and will likely pass me this coming year, officially making me the shortest one in the family. Davidi got his first call from the army - I wasn't expecting that either, though I should have been.
It's been a good year in many ways; a hard year in many others. I'm more tense starting this year than I was about last year; there seems to be more uncertainty, more stress, more things to worry about.
I don't want my sons to go to war; I don't want Israel to go to war. I don't want Iran to develop a nuclear weapon and I know that it could be to prevent this, I have to forego the previous request.
I don't want Obama to be re-elected. I think he's the worst president the US has chosen in many generations. I believe the mistakes he has made and would make, endanger Israel, the US, and even the world.
I don't want anti-Semitism to continue to rise - not in Germany, not in France, not in Sweden, and not in all the other countries where there are Jews today. I don't really care about the countries where there are no Jews.
I don't want the world to believe for a moment that the Arabs will settle for anything less than our complete destruction - this is the message they send to us, this is their promise. All the times they say otherwise are lies for foreign consumption. Listen to what they say - in Arabic, to their own people - this is their truth. Believe them.
And what do I want?
What do I wish for this coming year - in all honesty - I would ask for what I always ask for, and thankfully, what God has granted me each year - sometimes more, sometimes less - this year, I pray for more. I want His blessings to continue in health - for my children, for my husband, for me, my parents, my siblings and their families, my husband's family, and more. I wish for health for the sick of Israel and for a speedy recovery for those in need.
I wish for safety and security for Israel. That means that our borders are safe; our lives not threatened. That means an end to the rockets that are being fired at Israel almost daily and often several times a day. It means our sons will be bored on the borders of Israel - oh how I want them to be bored!
I wish and pray for peace - in my home, in my community, in my country and in the world. Peace is not the same as security - and so I pray for this above all else. Security will not bring peace but it means we will be safe; peace means safety and security. It means not only the absence of war, but the advent of quiet and an end to incitement. It means a man can make a movie - even a bad one, and that will not cause people to riot and murder. It means Israelis can travel and not worry about someone blowing up the buses they use.
I pray for wisdom that will teach me how to treat my family properly, that will help me continue to prosper in business. And may God grant our leaders wisdom to see the right path and the courage to take it.
May God bless the men and women of the IDF and may He watch over them, as they watch over us.
And may God grant me a lifetime of todays and tomorrows in this land. I want to watch my children grow in so many ways - always in happiness, in body and spirit and may God bless them with children (and more children). I want to see my grandson grow bigger, stronger, wiser, and even more beautiful than he is today - I want to live to see him marry and, with the many cousins I hope he will have, bring me great grandchildren.
I ask for so much after God has given me so much already. I can only be thankful that God knows this is the way and the wants of mothers.
A new year begins tomorrow night...may God bless His people of Israel with the blessings of a year of life, of health, of peace and prosperity.