There are so many facets to army life. There is the discipline that is demanded of each soldier; adherence to rules and regulations, time schedules and swift changes almost without warning. One example - the army has a schedule of when each soldier will be released. With the curse of having enemies on all our borders comes the blessing of having our sons and daughters come home on a somewhat regular schedule because Israel is a tiny country and our borders are ridiculously close to every Israeli home.
The Jordanian border is a 15 minute drive to the east of our home. The western border with Gaza is about an hour's drive. Southern and northern borders can be reached within a three hour drive (and that's only because the roads do a bit of twisting and turning).
But no matter what, short of war, our sons and daughters come home on a regular basis, even if the definition of regular changes a bit from unit to unit and even soldier to soldier.
Some soldiers are in the army for seven days, followed by seven days off. Others come home every weekend. Some come home every other weekend; some come one in three. In David's unit, they are coming home on this last schedule and I don't like it so much. But there are a few things that change timing a bit.
If there is a special need in the family, the army does what it can to accommodate. Let me give you a few examples of our benevolent army, as told to me this weekend as my son and I were chatting.
In David's unit, there is a boy that comes from a bereaved family. One brother committed suicide, a second was killed in a street fight at the age of 17. Each week, this boy is released from the army to spend all his weekends with his parents. He helps out; he is the glue that holds the family together. They need him; he needs them.
In David's unit, there are two soldiers who have married. They are all of 20 or 21, but you can't stop love and you shouldn't, and the army knows this and so these two boys go home with the unit every third week. They each go home one of the remaining two weeks so that together, the army is only "short" one man on any particular weekend.
In David's unit, there is a boy whose family relies on him to maintain the family business. Having him away so much is particularly hard and so, as the holidays are approaching, the army releases him every weekend.
This weekend, we needed Davidi home. His older brother's son needed an operation and though the operation itself was minor, it means that he can't do a weekly job that he has committed to for the last two years. He needed David to come home and take over that job and help so that he would be free to be with his wife and baby. The boy whose family needs him every week wouldn't be able to go, if David also went. And so another soldier stepped forward and gave up his weekend so that David and the other soldier could go help their families.
Our sons are very dedicated to the army; but the army is equally dedicated to doing its best to accommodate the needs of the soldiers and their families. After a while, if a soldier continually comes up with family events and reasons to be released, the army will begin to believe it is being taken advantage of...and will be less giving. But when a soldier comes once, as David did, his commanding officers do all they can. This is because the army realized that a happy soldier is a dedicated one.
But this is also because we are a tiny country and when possible, the needs of the one matter so very much.
And lest you think that I believe the army always accommodates its soldiers, don't worry, I know that they often can't. Six months after Elie entered the army, his father turned 50. We decided to throw him a surprise party and Elie asked his commanding officer to release him so he could attend. It was all arranged. He would catch the 6:00 a.m. bus to get off base and take a few more buses and arrive home. We had invited people to come over, it was all arranged.
And then, at 4:00 a.m. in the morning, Elie called to tell me it was all off. Then he called six hours later to tell me he could come home but there were no buses. I offered to drive more than two hours to go get him and as I collected the drinks and other things he asked me to bring to the soldiers who were remaining on base, Elie called again to tell me it was off again. Security "incidents" beat all. It took me hours to get an inkling of what was happening and weeks or perhaps even months to get the full story (Just When You Thought it Was Safe).
The army teaches them many things and one of the top ones is that they stand together. They are never alone. Many months ago, David was explaining how hard they were working under deadline. He came home exhausted. And as he explained, his younger sister had sympathy and asked him why he couldn't work a bit less hard and let the others work harder. If he would walk back to the next task rather than run, he'd ultimately do less rounds. He looked at her like she was crazy for a few seconds. The thought had clearly never entered his mind. And then he explained, "Aliza, they're like family. That's what they're called, 'the army family'."
The soldiers are taught to give all they can, knowing that in exchange, barring some security incident like war, for example, the army does what it can. And so, as a special favor to our family, the army released him. We enjoyed David this weekend, he helped his brother immeasurably, and thank God, the baby's doing very well. So thank you to the army of Israel for being so understanding, for letting one brother help another, for letting one mother get those precious hugs.
He's on his way back to base, back to that other world in which he lives, back to his other brothers, his other family.
May the God of Israel watch over him and all our soldiers.
The Jordanian border is a 15 minute drive to the east of our home. The western border with Gaza is about an hour's drive. Southern and northern borders can be reached within a three hour drive (and that's only because the roads do a bit of twisting and turning).
But no matter what, short of war, our sons and daughters come home on a regular basis, even if the definition of regular changes a bit from unit to unit and even soldier to soldier.
Some soldiers are in the army for seven days, followed by seven days off. Others come home every weekend. Some come home every other weekend; some come one in three. In David's unit, they are coming home on this last schedule and I don't like it so much. But there are a few things that change timing a bit.
If there is a special need in the family, the army does what it can to accommodate. Let me give you a few examples of our benevolent army, as told to me this weekend as my son and I were chatting.
In David's unit, there is a boy that comes from a bereaved family. One brother committed suicide, a second was killed in a street fight at the age of 17. Each week, this boy is released from the army to spend all his weekends with his parents. He helps out; he is the glue that holds the family together. They need him; he needs them.
In David's unit, there are two soldiers who have married. They are all of 20 or 21, but you can't stop love and you shouldn't, and the army knows this and so these two boys go home with the unit every third week. They each go home one of the remaining two weeks so that together, the army is only "short" one man on any particular weekend.
In David's unit, there is a boy whose family relies on him to maintain the family business. Having him away so much is particularly hard and so, as the holidays are approaching, the army releases him every weekend.
This weekend, we needed Davidi home. His older brother's son needed an operation and though the operation itself was minor, it means that he can't do a weekly job that he has committed to for the last two years. He needed David to come home and take over that job and help so that he would be free to be with his wife and baby. The boy whose family needs him every week wouldn't be able to go, if David also went. And so another soldier stepped forward and gave up his weekend so that David and the other soldier could go help their families.
Our sons are very dedicated to the army; but the army is equally dedicated to doing its best to accommodate the needs of the soldiers and their families. After a while, if a soldier continually comes up with family events and reasons to be released, the army will begin to believe it is being taken advantage of...and will be less giving. But when a soldier comes once, as David did, his commanding officers do all they can. This is because the army realized that a happy soldier is a dedicated one.
But this is also because we are a tiny country and when possible, the needs of the one matter so very much.
And lest you think that I believe the army always accommodates its soldiers, don't worry, I know that they often can't. Six months after Elie entered the army, his father turned 50. We decided to throw him a surprise party and Elie asked his commanding officer to release him so he could attend. It was all arranged. He would catch the 6:00 a.m. bus to get off base and take a few more buses and arrive home. We had invited people to come over, it was all arranged.
And then, at 4:00 a.m. in the morning, Elie called to tell me it was all off. Then he called six hours later to tell me he could come home but there were no buses. I offered to drive more than two hours to go get him and as I collected the drinks and other things he asked me to bring to the soldiers who were remaining on base, Elie called again to tell me it was off again. Security "incidents" beat all. It took me hours to get an inkling of what was happening and weeks or perhaps even months to get the full story (Just When You Thought it Was Safe).
The army teaches them many things and one of the top ones is that they stand together. They are never alone. Many months ago, David was explaining how hard they were working under deadline. He came home exhausted. And as he explained, his younger sister had sympathy and asked him why he couldn't work a bit less hard and let the others work harder. If he would walk back to the next task rather than run, he'd ultimately do less rounds. He looked at her like she was crazy for a few seconds. The thought had clearly never entered his mind. And then he explained, "Aliza, they're like family. That's what they're called, 'the army family'."
The soldiers are taught to give all they can, knowing that in exchange, barring some security incident like war, for example, the army does what it can. And so, as a special favor to our family, the army released him. We enjoyed David this weekend, he helped his brother immeasurably, and thank God, the baby's doing very well. So thank you to the army of Israel for being so understanding, for letting one brother help another, for letting one mother get those precious hugs.He's on his way back to base, back to that other world in which he lives, back to his other brothers, his other family.
May the God of Israel watch over him and all our soldiers.
Refuah shelema to your grandson.
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