A World of Wants...from a Soldier's Mother

 I'm trying. And I'm failing. Each morning I think today I will be able to concentrate. Today, I will think of something else, be the person I was before.

I'm bored with posting, thinking the world will listen. I'm not bored speaking "to the choir" because we all need to read something and say, "YES, finally, someone else thinks like I do".

But what I really want is someone from the side of "closed eyes" to say I've helped open their view; someone from the side of hate to say, wow you are suffering and Hamas did cause that.

Someone to agree that the appalling numbers that Hamas is publishing of casualties is as reliable as Hamas or as likely as UN peacekeepers are at keeping the peace.

I want them to acknowledge that in whatever real number of casualties - and there are real numbers and real suffering in Gaza - that there are thousands and thousands of terrorists - confirmed by Israel to be at least 9,000 (with another 21,000 that need killing) armed combatants. That the 2,000 rockets Hamas and Islamic Jihad mis-fired into Gaza, are responsible for hundreds (if not thousands) of lost lives in Gaza.

I want them to acknowledge that Israel has done all it can, more than ANY other country did in ANY other war to save lives.

I want...

I want it to end - but not end before we bring them home, and so it won't end.

I want to sleep at night; to know they won't call my sons back; that all the sons and daughters are back on their bases.

I want to feel the sun shining on my face and not think of the hostages in the darkness of the tunnels.

I want Kfir home and years from now, I want him to listen to his parents as they tell him of the nightmare the last quarter of the first year of his life was and I want him to smile and say he doesn't remember anything, as he prepares to get married.

I want one stinking day to pass that doesn't include tears.

I want every one of the South Africans who sat in the Hague at the International Court of Justice to go to hell and then I realized, I don't have to want that because they have made a bargain with the devils - Hamas and Iran - and so they are in hell every day of their lives.

I want to not feel guilty if I laugh, if I smile. I want to listen to my friend, a comedian and one of the funniest people I know, and not feel I am betraying those who cannot laugh.

I want to stop worrying about the mothers and fathers and sisters and brothers of soldiers in this country (and many who live abroad) who spend all day and night in fear of a knock on the door.

I want peace. A peace that will allow everyone to come to Jerusalem and marvel at her beauty without wanting to take her from us. We, who created her, we who built her. We who have loved her for thousands of years, and we who have always been willing to share her and protect her from those who want to dominate her and claim her as theirs alone.

I want the rain of winter in Israel to wash away the pain and bring the sunshine within our hearts back to Israel.

I want.....