It's Friday in My Country - the Date is October 7, 2023

It's Friday in my beautiful country. A storm is supposed to come in later today or tomorrow but right now the sun is winning the battle though the clouds creep closer of the mountains across the valley. We are a people with a long history and sometimes, that history sits on our souls.

Today is the 10th day of the Hebrew month of Tevet, a fast day. In the 9th year King Zedkekiah's reign, our holy city, Jerusalem, was attacked and besieged by the Babylonians. Their king, Nebuchadnezzer II ordered the Jerusalem be conquered. It would take them 18 months...on the 17th day of the Hebrew month of Tammuz, the walls surrendered and the Babylonians entered the city and destroyed our Holy Temple.

And now, 2,613 years later, we fast in remembrance. That is what my people are about. A memory as old as time...we remember. The fall of the city walls then, and again when the Romans attacked still cause us pain and, laugh if you will (I certainly did), I found myself angry when in Rome. I sat on the tourist bus as part of my 11-hour lay over that I planned to see a place I'd never seen.

And I was...disturbed...upset...impatient and my head said to my heart, "Oh my God, Paula, get over it. Are you really angry about what the Romans did more than 2,000 years ago?"

My heart thought about the question, though there are those people who think that only the brain can think. But truth is - the brain can feel and the heart can think - if you let them. So that day in Rome, as my eyes took in the amazing sight of modern day Rome, my heart thought about the question that my brain had asked. Was I sincerely angry?

It was at that very moment, that my ears heard the tour guide explain that on our right was some of the remaining wall of Rome's Old City. My eyes looked carefully and my brain said to my heart, "See. Look. They call that their Old City but it's dead. No one lives here. Think of our Old City, where thousands live, where people sing and dance, shop and sleep. Where people live.

So yes, my heart explains to you now...if we can still be "angry" at what the Romans did to us, what the Babylonians did to our beautiful city, God help the Palestinians because we will never forget October 7, not in a thousand years, not in 2,613 years.

You see, on May 14, 1948, our year 5,708, we were attacked by 5 Arab armies. That we can forgive while we focus on the rebirth of our country. The War of Independence as yet another battle our people fought with honor and bravery.

But October 7 was not a war, it was a massacre. It was, like the attack by the Amalekites, an act of cowardice and barbarity. And so here we are on the 10th of Tevet and the 23rd of Tishrei 5784 (October 7, 2023) at the very same time.

"Honestly, only the Jews could come up with a concept like that," says my brain.

"Shut up," snaps my heart. "Don't you see this is painful? Don't you understand this feels like it will never end? We are so tired."

My eyes fill with tears and my head nods, a bit ashamed that our brain claims residency in her area. It is at that moment, my brain speaks the truth...

Look outside the window, my brain begins. I'll tell you what you see. You see mountains in the distance to the east...these were ours 2,000 years ago; these are ours today. Now look to the north - the settlements of Eli, Shilo and Beit El. Two are names of places mentioned in the Bible, we know for sure that at least one of these is in the exact same place as it was then. The third is the name of one of the High Priests.

We are working our way through another year, both in the Jewish calendar and the solar one. Our second Simchat Torah at war, missing our hostages, in pain. We have passed Chanukah. The earth continues to revolve, the sun rises and sets each day, and we are frozen.

We are a people misunderstood and for the most part, we don't care or expect anyone to really understand us. At least here in Israel, we love the world in which we live. We are one family. There are few "strangers" in Israel. Instead, we freely speak to anyone on the train, waiting at a bus, in the store.

Without even trying very hard, nearly everyone can find someone in common that they know within a minute or two. We all know someone who was there...there on October 7, someone who is fighting, someone who was killed in the fighting. Most know more than one or two.

It's Friday in my country. It's cold and supposed to rain. And the date is still October 7, 2023...over 450 days of endless agony.